For the Joy

For the joy of human love, brother, sister, parent, child, friends on earth, and friends above, for all gentle thoughts and mild. – For the Beauty of the Earth, Folliott S. Pierpoint

The fog the week after Doug died was real. Our last night in the hospital I pray was comforting to him. I talked about his Dad and Maine and how much we loved him. There was little sleep in the hours that followed knowing I had to share the news. How does one give voice to those words? Our son said it heartbreakingly best, “I just didn’t know it would be today.” You always think there will be more time, even as time grows short.

In the week that followed, there were meals and calls and cards and messages. There were details and arrangements. There was an overwhelming absence. Through the fog, though, one sentiment emerged so strongly. Doug was at rest, and those of us who loved him needed comfort. Remembering the love we shared would hold us upright.

Music is especially important to my son. It helps him navigate feelings that are too complex for words. He selected the Shaker Song’s “Simple Gifts” melody from Aaron Copeland’s Appalachian Spring for the prelude, such a beautiful choice. He also made a playlist of Doug’s favorite songs as background music for the luncheon that followed the service. Doug would have approved. He loved a good mix tape.

While my daughter did not have a favorite hymn, I wanted to choose something for the service that reflected the pure joy of the love she and Doug shared. For the Beauty of the Earth always brought comfort with its gentle lyrics. You just feel the love, and we did – the love that surrounded us in the church that day, the love flooding down from those no longer with us, the love which embraced Doug from his first moment to his last. There is nothing more beautiful.